Books & Breath Book Club Review: When the Body Says No by Gabor Maté
- Patti Chou
- 15 hours ago
- 4 min read
A note before we begin
This post is for everyone who couldn't make it to our last gathering — so you don't miss the conversation, just the time zone. But it's also for anyone who found their way here looking for an honest, thoughtful take on this book. You're welcome here too.
If you've been part of Books & Breath for a while, you're used to receiving our post-meeting recaps by email. We're moving those recaps here — to this blog — so that the conversations we're having don't stay tucked away in an inbox.
When the Body Says No: The Cost of Hidden Stress — Gabor Maté
Genre: Mind-Body Medicine / Pop Psychology / Self-Help
Maté's central argument is one that many people find intuitively resonant: that unprocessed emotional and spiritual stress has real impact for the body. The mind-body connection is not a fringe idea — it's increasingly supported by research in trauma, neuroscience, and chronic illness. That's exactly why this book attracted our attention.
Our group averaged 1.3 out of 5
This is considerably lower than its Goodreads reception — and worth reflecting on.
First, it's worth noting that the negative reactions started well before we even met — the Reader's Lounge, our WhatsApp group where members share thoughts as they read, was vocal from early on. Not liking a book is just as rich as loving it. Both mean it hit something real.
The stress-illness connection — that unprocessed emotional and spiritual stress impacts the body and mind — is something many of us understand intuitively, and the group acknowledged that. The frustration wasn't with the idea. It was with the execution.
The writing felt unsophisticated, scattered and narrow, and lack consideration for the reader's experience. What the group found difficult is that the book reads more as opinion than evidence. Maté leans heavily on a single primary source, building his theory largely on anecdotal patient stories — using those stories as currency, some observed, rather than honoring them as the full human experiences they are. For a topic where a wealth of trauma research exists and goes uncited, that felt like a missed opportunity at best, and irresponsible at worst.
His lens stays laser-focused on repressed emotion and family trauma to the point where almost everything gets explained through that single filter. Some recognized a familiar pattern — the clinician who, once they find a trauma history, stops looking for other contributing factors. That reductionism ultimately undermines his credibility and oversimplifies disease causation in ways that can genuinely mislead people. The bigger concern — worth naming the stress-illness framework, handled with care, could shine a light on systemic harm and open conversations about policy, equity, and collective healing. Instead, the book lands squarely in hyper-individualistic territory: you're sick because of your unresolved emotions. There's no time spent on societal causes or collective social change — just personal blame/responsibility. This felt like a significant miss.
"Pop psychology" was a phrase that came up. The group agreed — this isn't new. It's just disappointing when we are searching for something deep and meaningful.
What we're not throwing away
With a healthy measure of appreciation and skepticism, here's what stayed with us: The acknowledgment that physical, emotional, and spiritual stress causes real suffering — in the body, the heart, the mind — is true. Our desire to read this book came from a genuine place: wanting to understand ourselves, to find answers, to make sense of the human condition. Some wondered whether Maté's own unprocessed trauma shaped his lens so completely that he couldn't see around it. That's not a condemnation — it's a very human thing to do.
We also found ourselves returning to the Bhagavad Gita (discussed last month) during the discussion — how it offers something this book couldn't quite reach: genuine internal navigation of our emotional and spiritual landscape, without collapsing its complexity.
A note on the world we're reading in
The close of our conversation moved somewhere tender. In the middle of what's happening politically, financially, and culturally across different corners of the world right now, it's hard not to feel a deep sense of disturbance. Unsafe, even. The question of how we live beyond these circumstances didn't have a clean answer. What it had was this: focus on the people around you. Create more love and support where you can. Love yourself even more fiercely in times like these.
There's more we didn't get to
This is just a partial picture of the conversation. What do you think? If something is still sitting with you — a question you're turning over, a point you wish we'd gone deeper on — leave a comment below or bring it to the Reader's Lounge. That's exactly what it's there for.
Next up: Recognition Sutras — Christopher Hareesh Wallis
Our next book feels like a fitting turn. Recognition Sutras explores what true, authentic self-acceptance means within the movement of self-transformation, drawing on one of the great ancient spiritual masterpieces- a primary source for nondual Tantrik Yoga, accurately translated and fully explained.
Whether you are a yoga teacher/practitioner who want to go deeper, a philosophy nerd who loves a good conversation, or someone who just keeps bumping into the word "tantra" and wants to actually understand it- this is the room.
Just 18 sutras — offering a direct path to nondual understanding and practices that support the recognition of our own deepest nature. I can't wait to explore it together with you.
Save the Date for Our Next Discussion
Recognition Sutras — Christopher Hareesh Wallis
March Meeting Saturday, 21 March 2026 at 9:00 AM Taiwan Time
In your time zone:
New Zealand (NZDT) — Saturday 2:00 PM
Australia (AEDT) — Saturday 12:00 PM
US Eastern — Friday, March 20 at 8:00 PM
US Central — Friday, March 20 at 7:00 PM
US Pacific — Friday, March 20 at 5:00 PM
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